Archive for the ‘Pregnancy’ Category

Pregnancy Week 21

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Is it April yet?

I probably shouldn’t even write this today because I’m bound to start hissing and spitting. I’m in a terrible, TERRIBLE mood. No reason. I just am. I’ve cried three times today. Once because I couldn’t decide how many malt balls I wanted.

So, you wanna know how week 21 has been? Oh just a cheery flippin’ blast.

Someone asked me this week if I’ve been feeling very emotional and the answer is yes. If I don’t cry at least once a day then I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished anything. And bi-polar has nothing on me. Literally in the same sentence I can go from being your best friend and talking about how much I want to stay up all night brushing each other’s hair to snapping arms off if you look at me. I hate it! I don’t even want to be around myself.

And you’d think all this ho-ho-ho cheer would fix it. But no. In fact, the entire “holiday season” is irritating me this year.

That said….

There is no question I’m pregnant. This is a legitimate pregnant belly. I keep running in to people who I haven’t seen in a few months, or even weeks, and they each tell me that it looks like I haven’t gained any weight and that I’ve just got a little basketball. And I’m so grateful for that! It really does make a pregnant girl feel a little better. Truth be told I’ve put on 25 pounds and my doctor doesn’t scoff at that number so I guess I’m doing OK. It’s literally all being carried in my breasts, belly and the two zits that have taken front row seats to my misery on my chin. I feel really good. I joke about being a moose, but really, I’d be lying if I said this isn’t the pregnant body I’ve always hoped for.

There is also no question that there is a very live baby inside of me. She is so active. There’s no schedule, but I tend to get a good morning, a good afternoon and a good night, with a lot of surprise visits in between. Some are really forceful, and some tickle, as odd as that might sound. Some are just slight little flutters. Whatever is going on in there has got her in the mood to move because I feel like all I’ve done is receive morse code messages from the womb this week.

The leg cramps continue. The heartburn continues. My back has surprisingly not been as bad, so I’m hoping that I get a reprieve there for a while.

I’ve also had a few of the weird pregnancy dreams. Like… had the baby and an hour later the doctor said we were fine and to go home. So we did. Shel and I had plans that night so we got a babysitter and left our HOURS OLD BABY at home. Then, the same night…. another dream where I was trying to get rid of my baby weight and Shelton kept pushing all this air around inside my abdomen until it ballooned out my back and all we needed to do was “pop the balloon” and I’d be back in my regular jeans. And finally…. the third dream…. my belly button had stretched so large I could set a cereal bowl inside of it. Gross.

Saying outloud that tomorrow I’ll be 22 weeks is dumbfounding to me. For the most part this entire thing still feels so surreal and I can honestly say I don’t think I’ve truly grasped the reality yet. When you wait this long for something, it takes a while to accept it.

I did make my very first baby purchase today. Socks. They were on clearance for 70 cents a pair at Target so I grabbed a handful. Can’t have too many socks, right?

Pregnancy Week 20

Monday, December 14th, 2009

Week 20 equals the half-way point and that means some serious excitement and anxiety. With each passing week the reality of our little “situation” becomes ever more apparent and with that comes a host of emotions like “complete and utter panic,” “what were we thinking,” “she’s going to be perfect!,” “how soon can we cuddle,” and “denial.”

OK, so some of those aren’t what most people would classify as “emotions.” It does sort of read like one of those As Seen on TV record advertisements.

I think our range of emotions from nervous, panic and denial to excitement and curiosity is probably fairly normal. I almost think we’d be odd if we didn’t feel all of these things. Which is why bringing home the crib last night hit me like a ton of bricks and made me have this “come to Jesus” moment. Like, OH MY GOD A REAL PERSON IS COMING HERE! Some friends offered up their retired crib and sent it home with us and we are so incredibly grateful. It’s perfect – the color, style, everything is exactly what I’ve had in mind. (THANK YOU!!)

We also brought home an antique wooden rocking cradle from Shelton’s grandparents. My understanding is that every Koskie kid since Shelton’s dad has snoozed in this cradle. Pretty special.

Sitting in it right now is a positively adorable pink OU diaper bag, a gift from another dear friend. Seriously, SWOON over this bag. It’s trimmed in pink polka-dots and the zippers have little football charms. “Sooner born and Sooner bred…” (THANK YOU!!)

In other week 20 news, I flew to LA for a whirlwind two-day trip so that I could attend the Biggest Loser finale for work. This was my fourth live Biggest Loser finale and probably my favorite. It was so much fun to catch-up with contestants who I now call friends and get to know the newest alum of this incredible show. They are truly amazing people, each and every one of them, and whether you have five pounds or 500 pounds to lose, you can’t help but feel inspired to just do better. While I’ve met host Ali Sweeney a few times before, this time we had a chance to chat and snap a few pics. I also had the opportunity to have dinner w/ Biggest Loser Cookbook and Most Decadent Diet author Chef Devin Alexander. She was adorable and funny and her food was AAAAMAZING!!! She sent me home with an autographed copy of “Decadent,” and I’m anxious to crack it open!

This trip helped me realize that my travel hence forward will be done by car. I just can’t handle another airplane. After the snot-covered, tear-soaked hysterical break-down in LAX (because of a canceled flight, coupled with exhaustion and killer back pain) I decided that flying just wasn’t worth whatever was on the other side. (Unless the other side involved all you could eat pizza for days and days and days…and maybe Oprah!!) I broke this to my co-workers in NYC and was not the least bit surprised to hear they were understanding. Maybe I’ll finally coax them to Wichita… yeah right!

I also discussed the maternity leave plan with my boss this week and I think we have something in place that is fair for both sides. I honestly can’t foresee taking a full six-to-eight week maternity leave, but I guess we’ll just have to see when we get there.

And finally, maybe the most exciting news of all from week 20, we’ve got a mover and a shaker on our hands. This little girl has been moving for a few weeks, but really deep little flutters only noticeable to me, and often indistinguishable between flutters and gas. But sitting on my connection flight between Dallas and Wichita, I felt a bump in my stomach like nothing I’ve ever felt before. Positively amazing! I’m sure I looked like a total freak on the plane with both my hands shoved down the front of my elastic maternity pant panel, but I was not about to pass up the chance to feel her with my hands for the first time. The entire 45-minute flight home the monster gave me quite a show. I was literally giggling out loud at some of the bumps because it was just the most incredibly satisfying moment. I of course bragged the news to Shelton when I got home and he was thrilled. It took two or three more days before Shelton was finally able to get his first feel of our little girl. Wow! What a moment. So far she doesn’t keep much of a schedule, her bumps, rolls and kicks come at all hours of the day (and night) and can last for one or two thumps or for 30 minutes or more. She also plays hard to get. I can feel her for the longest time, finally have Shelton come over to feel and she’s done.

Overall I’m actually feeling pretty good. Just dealing with a lot of pretty constant back pain and fatigue. I keep waiting for this “dawning of the day second trimester second coming” event, but I feel like that’s one pregnancy milestone that’s going to pass me over. We’re seven weeks in to this trimester and while I feel a hundred times better than I did in the first, I still feel tired, lethargic and famished all the time.

Maternity Pants

Tuesday, December 8th, 2009

I’ve never been the type of person you could tag as frugal, cheap, penny pinching or budget conscious. Shelton is one of those guys who will put $20 in his wallet and six months later catch himself off guard when he realizes it’s still there. I, on the other hand, when presented with $20 I can dream up three ways to spend it within the hour in the microseconds it takes to have the bill placed in my hand. And I will.

When Shelton met me, not only was I a college co-ed with a rockin’ body, I was swimming in debt. Not the 20/20 investigative reporting kind of tens-of-thousands of dollars debt, but in two years in college I’d maxed three credit cards and owed roughly $5,000. Earning $5.50 an hour at Old Navy was barely feeding me three meals a day, much less paying back Discover for my boots, tattoo and Friday night cash advances.

Shelton comes from a family of CPAs, and you could effortlessly tag them as frugal, cheap, penny pinching or budget conscious. I tease him, and his mom, they they are like squirrels with little pockets of money holed up here, there and everywhere, and would never spend a dime without researching their personal financial history, future predictions of the stock market and how much bread and milk they have in the refrigerator.

So when we started dating, you can imagine both of our surprise with the other’s spending habits. Shelton wanted to stay in and make dinner, and I didn’t see the harm with going out for the fifth time that week. Over the years, as couples will do, we’ve adopted each other’s habits. I still wouldn’t say I’m a penny pincher, but I’m definitely much more budget conscious, so much so that I actually have to reign in Shelton occasionally and he’s had to reconcile with being a little more “comfortable” with spending money rather spontaneously, on stupid things.

Yes, this has something vaguely to do with maternity pants. I think more than health reasons, I’m so adamant about maintaining my weight because I don’t want to have to restock my closet if I were to gain. I mean, that would be expensive, and certainly not in the budget.

So I’ve actually been somewhat fearful of what would happen when I got pregnant and slowly but surely started retiring clothing. I was rather relieved when my sister, who delivered a little girl two weeks before we had our embryo transfer, offered a huge tub of maternity clothes. I sorted through and walked away with two pairs of jeans, few pairs of khaki shorts, and a shirt or two. Jeans were the biggest score, I was thrilled that they fit me and were a wash/style I would wear.

I’d held on to my $200 of birthday money for several months and when finally faced with having to buy maternity clothes used that. Two hundred dollars does not go far on any shopping budget, but especially toward maternity clothes because you can’t just hit up a Target sale rack and raid the 75% off trendy tops.

I carefully executed my maternity choices. I invested in a dark wash jean, that way I could “dress up” if I needed to. Fortunately I work from home so purchasing a work-appropriate wardrobe was not necessary. In fact, it was an advantage because I have a stock pile of yoga pants, PJ pants and other loungey cotton bottoms. And I’ll be damned if those elastic bands don’t just keep on stretching!

So here I am, with three pairs of maternity jeans, and only one I actually ever want to wear. It’s a full-coverage waist or whatever you call it, meaning the elastic panel covers my entire belly. They are the perfect length, color, fit, etc. The other two just have bands that fit underneath my belly and they are so annoying to wear.

First, maternity pants don’t come with belt loops. So with the “other two” pairs of maternity pants, I feel like an eight-year-old boy with no hips because with every four steps I take I have to hike them back up, along with my panties that tend to slide down with them. Wearing those pants in public is a workout.

Also, on those pants, somehow the elastic band has bent inside its fabric covering. So the little bit of coverage it would offer has been cut in half. And it’s annoying.

If you see me running around in the same jeans you saw me in the previous ten times, I’m not dirty, I’m just adopting some of that Koskie frugality and refuse to drop cash on pants I only need for four more months.

Pregnancy Week 19

Monday, December 7th, 2009

Week 19 will probably go down as the most memorable of this entire pregnancy. For this was the week that we found out our little monster is a she-monster. It’s a girl, and we couldn’t be more thrilled! She was quite cooperative for the sonogram, and by cooperative I mean not very lady like as she showed us all her business, or lack thereof.

It has unexpectedly completely changed my feelings toward this pregnancy in a way that’s really hard to describe. Not that was happy, excited and anxious before, but it’s all been exponentially increased. While I’ve been like, whatever, April will get here. Now I’m like, IS IT APRIL YET?!

I get the dumbest, giddy grin on my face every time I IM or tell Shelton “your daughter…” and it’s usually followed by “won’t stop moving.” This week she became incredibly active. There’s still no real pace or predictability to it, but there’s definitely no doubt that she’s in there now. A couple of days after the sonogram I was able to feel her from the outside for the first time. That took me off guard and was pretty exciting. I immediately placed Shelton’s hand in the spot, but alas, nothing. I’ve been told it could still be a couple more months before either of us really gets to enjoy external movement, so for now, it’s like this fun little secret that’s all mine.

I think I had another growth spurt this week. While changing a few days ago Shelton commented that I definitely looked pregnant now and that my belly had grown larger than my boobs… finally! Those are still a feat to be reckoned with, but at least my belly is taking the lead.

The heartburn that could make a dragon cry continues relentlessly. I had a few nights of leg cramps this week that, much to my doctor’s surprise, are in my upper thigh. He said that’s odd and not common. But these cramps are in the joints of my hips and knees, as well as the calf and thigh muscles. It’s so painful and so annoying. I just keep hydrating and blame it on shifting bones and muscles.

The other issue I’m still facing is my toothbrushing sickness. Putting toothpaste in my mouth makes me so ill I end up dry heaving for five minutes every morning. It’s awful. Most mornings I’m just running a dry toothbrush over my teeth to kick off the funk and then going back w/ paste later in the day when my stomach has had time to equalize. I’ve even switched toothpastes. This is one phase that doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.

I’m also experiencing A LOT of back pain. By around 9:00 at night, there is not a comfortable position to be found. No chair, floor, pillow or position alleviates the pain. Shelton has been amazing and volunteers a back rub most nights and it helps, for a moment, and I’m so thankful to have those.

Today we kick-off week 20, our half-way point, and I’m almost feeling that same sense of relief we did transitioning from first to second trimester.

Pregnancy Quotes of the Week – Week 19

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

We called Shelton’s mom to tell her the baby’s gender:

Shelton: So we had a sonogram today.

Mom: Oh! Are you sharing sex with me?

Shelton & Brandi: Ummmmm…. not with you.

While talking to a friend about my tendency to keep things well planned and organized:

“Your baby is going to come out organizing her own diaper changings.”

It’s a Girl

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009

We had a sonogram today and very clearly saw that very soon we will have a daughter.

We are ecstatic!