That’s the title of an episode of Friends that just kills me every time I see it. It’s like Beaches, or Steel Magnolias. It’s an unavoidable fact that you WILL CRY every time you see it. Man, woman, child, horse- your body will writhe with vicious emotion and it will have no exit but to saturate your face in tears!!

I’m often heard quoting scenes from Friends. It remains one of my favorite TV shows. Tonight this episode aired in which Chandler and Monica go to the fertility clinic to test his sperm and for her to have “an invasive vaginal exam.” That evening they get a call from the doctor, and Chandler receives the news. Moments later he tells Monica that he has low motility and her womb is an inhospitable environment. That’s the moment where the bubble bursts in my throat and the tears stream down. Like me, Chandler cuts through the tension w/ a joke, telling Monica that his guys won’t get out of their barcaloungers and even if they did, her womb is prepared to kill anything that enters.

It also bugs me- because it’s the start of yet another TV show infertility storyline that bears no resemblance to real life. I know doctors, firefighters, cops, grocery store janitors, mailmen and taxi drivers all say the same thing about TV/movies related to them. But it’s true. Chandler and Monica zip-zing right through all of the steps and surprisingly wind up with twins at their adoptive baby’s birth. Definitely the happy ending ALL of us should enjoy.

I’m all for people finding creative, interesting ways to get the word out about infertility and help along their own pursuit to start a family. Obviously.

That’s why I loved finding this story of a British woman who advertised for an egg donor so that she and her husband could get pregnant. They tried for 14 years to conceive, and went through a few rounds of IVF (including ICSI which is the procedure Shelton and I will use). All without success- due to a blocked fallopian tube, her age and her body stopped producing eggs.

With a desire to still carry a baby of her own – she invested 2,000GBP (~ $4000) to advertise in 50 buses in London. It took three weeks for an anonymous donor to come forward. She delivered her healthy, beautiful little girl on June 3 (my sister’s birthday!).

Good for them and Congratulations!!

I stumbled on this article tonight from Newsweek explaining a recent survey conducted at Duke and Johns Hopkins University that found 60% of infertility patients would give their embryos to stem cell research before they’d adopt them. They say that this stat mirrors the support of the American public for stem cell research. Makes you wonder why Bush, “representing the people,” just signed another stem cell veto!!

Shelton and I have discussed this. It’s one of the MANY topics infertile couples get to discuss that most couples never have to, unless they want to. What do you do with extra embryos??? Our first choice is to freeze for a second attempt should we have enough. Our second choice is to donate to stem cell research. I just think there is far too much good to come out of supporting that research to not offer my hand in some way.

I know 40% of the people reading this post are probably outraged. It wouldn’t be the first time me or this site have pissed off someone. I guess I can see the compassion in putting those embryos up for adoption, but something doesn’t settle with me to give someone else my baby when I’m perfectly capable of having and raising them myself. I also can’t stomach the thought of just destroying them.

If you’re new to infertility, or just haven’t had the conversation yet- it’s a must. You have to talk about the final destination of any unused embryos, because it can really be one of the most important decisions you make in this journey. And this recent survey, proves you won’t be alone no matter which path you choose.