If you’ve followed BabyOrBust for any length of time, you know that I’ve tried to find the silver lining in the infertility and IVF. And if you’re just joining us then FYI, this is my philosophy! I just never found the value in being bitter, angry, depressed and sad about the situation. Nothing I could do about it, so I made it work for me. I like to think this positive attitude is what helped us survive with our marriage not only in tact, but stronger, and our sanity as shaky as it was to start!

So one of those silver lining items was that we basically got to pick when we would get pregnant. Rather than an “uh-oh, what about that trip/event/etc.” that can suddenly and unexpectedly be squashed by however many pink or blue lines are supposed to show up on the stick (clearly, home pregnancy tests are foreign to me), we got to look at our schedules and choose.

We had four times in the year that were available to us. Being that Kansas gets to be 157 degrees in the shade with no wind in the summer, I knew I didn’t want to haul my 950-pound, 8-months pregnant rear around in the sweltering heat. Given my job and the seasonality that can come with that, I also wanted to be able to deliver and take maternity leave in the “off season.” So when the July IVF cycle was available, we took it.

I’m finding that what is living in my uterus is not a baby, but instead a furnace. A heat radiating furnace with the fire of 100 dragons and 10 hells. I’ve always been a cold person. I take a hoodie with me everywhere I go. But now, I swear to all things holy that I’m positively burning up night and day. It’s 30 degrees outside, and while everyone else has their fireplaces and heaters going, I’m running around inside in a tank top while Shelton shivers under sweatshirts and fleece pants begging to turn the heat on. At that point my head spins around, showers him with sweat and I scream NOOO!!!

If our down comforter even creeps on to my side of the bed I freak out. GET THAT THING OFF OF ME! I might as well be suffocating under it.

I’ve had pregnant friends who cussed their constant hot flashes. But they were all pregnant in the warmer months. I had no idea that July, August, December, January — doesn’t matter — the heat will find you and burrow itself deep inside your body.

We’re supposed to be getting our first snow this week, and the only reason I’m even mildly interested is because I’ll be able to go outside in a T-shirt and be comfortable!